We Should All Be Immigrants

Most Americans – realAmericans, that is (no, that’s not a typo) – would agree that we are an extremely fortunate group of people. The country we live in, indeed, the country our Founding Fathers created for us, is the best there ever was. No realAmerican would argue with that.

However, there are those, many of who run the current version of the government, that would not agree with such a notion. They are adamantly opposed to any opinion that puts the idea of a free society in a glowing light. These “socialists” believe that we the people do not deserve the benefits of a free and prosperous America. So they set out to destroy it. They need to be exposed and disposed of.

And the time may be coming. BO seems intent on spoiling chances for the re-election of Democrats in November. Many are already announcing their opposition to the floods of illegals jumping the border, and decry the secrecy of the event ordered by the regime. It’s typical Democrat underhandedness in dealing with the American people. You can bet that, in a couple of years, they will be changing their tune, to announce how they favored the sneaky immigration of thousands of illegals, all along. “Don’t worry,” they’ll say, “ we had your back, all along. Now, get out and vote for a Democrat.” The best thing Congress can do, when, hopefully, Republicans win the Senate this year, is to pass a law requiring citizenship and five-years of residency before new immigrants can vote. That, at least, would be a law with which most of us would agree.

I got real curious about the immigration business and looked up a couple of unregistered Democrats about what drove them to enter our country illegally. It went something like this:

“So, Pedro, you are re-wading the Rio Grande and returning to the land of your birth,” says I.

“Si, Senor Newshawk, I waded across the reever to come here to find a new life. I wanted to find a good job, so I can support my family in Me-he-co.”

“Did you consider you might be taking away a job from an American worker?”

“Oh, hell, no. It’s dog-eat-dog out there, man.”

“And were you planning to pay taxes on the money you earned by taking a job from an American worker, who would have to pay taxes to the IRS?”

“Not if I could help it, no sir.”

“So what makes you want to return to Mexico?” I asked as if I didn’t already know.

“There are no jobs, senor, almost everyday the government says the unemployment rate is going down, and more jobs have opened up, but no matter where I look, there are no jobs. Your presidente, Senor BO, ees always yammering about creating jobs. I theenk  BO tells lies, Senor Newshawk.”

“You won’t get any argument from me, Pedro. But you, Alberto,” acknowledging Pedro’s compatriot, “have decided to stay in the country. How come?”

“Oh, senor, America is a wonderful place to live.”

“Why do you think so, while Pedro can’t wait to get out of here?”

“The first place I go is the unemployment office, see, and a fat lady in an office tells me they have no jobs. But, she says the government will be glad to pay me for doing nothing, so she writes me a check. And says they will send me one just like it every month. The check is large enough to buy clothes, pay rent, and buy food, but the fat lady says I don’t have to spend any of the money she just gave me on food, and hands me a pile of food stamps and says I’ll be getting more every month.”

“Unbelievable, ain’t it?” I observed.

“I asked the fat lady what I had to do to earn the money …”

“And she said, ‘Nothing’, right?”

“Si, nada. I thank the fat lady and start to leave her office, but she says, Here, don’t forget your new cell phone. The government pays for that, too.”

“Gracias, I say. Then she says, ‘Don’t forget to vote for Democrats in the upcoming elections. Republicans are too hoity-toity to pay for this crap.’”

“I tell her I’m not registered to vote in America. And she says not to worry, I can sign up at Burger King. I say I have no I.D. She says, no need, give them your name or a phony name, they’ll never know the difference. That’s how friendly we Democrats are. Very trusting. And the bottom line is, she said, Democrats aren’t picky who votes for them, and I shouldn’t be either. And, oh, by the way, says the fat lady, healthcare for you and your entire family is free. The American taxpayer will take care of the whole thing. We are a very generous people.

“And senor, you wonder why I want to stay here?”

“No, not really, what’s one more freeloader?”

“Man, oh, man,” whoops Alberto, “What a country! Everything free, while I sit around on my skinny immigrant ass.”